I written before about my love of organising or perhaps the real truth – feeling organised.
This weekend I had a moment of joy filling up the salt and pepper grinders so they were full to the top. They looked neat which meant organised.
In the same way, knowing that something is running to time ticks all my boxes as it means things are running to schedule, so when Baby Teaspoon arrived on my first day of maternity leave you could say it was just as it should be.
But that moment is where the schedule thing stopped.
I knew that’s what would happen but what I hadn’t thought through was how that would make me feel.
I was totally committed to going with the flow, after all, Baby was getting used to life on planet earth yet I was desperate to know when things were going to happen so I could mentally if not practically be ready and organised.
I wasn’t prepared for how loosing any sense of rhythm to day-to-day life could make me feel so anxious. I had to keep telling myself slowly in head over and over SHE’S A BABY! (This also totally made me start singing “she’s a baby” like on the tv show shooting stars when the character George Doors came on. If you don’t know what I mean watch this clip)
So now I am desperately trying to get my head around living in a new kind of organised chaos which at times feels unnatural, uncomfortable.
I am embracing my new normal.
The new normal means having a house that looks like a muslin cloth show room – seriously there is one in every room show casing a different colour and size.
The new normal means becoming fluent in gurgle.
The new normal means having to use lifts (elevator) instead of the escalator – this is a whole new world. It’s very similar to the way people eye up a queue at the super market check out. Hovering a little not wanting to be in the queue that will take longer than the one next to them instead this time it’s push chairs at the ready, inching forward a little each time a new push chair joins the queue to get the message across that you were here first and when those doors open, you are getting in.
Oh yes. It’s a whole new world out there kids.